Wait, isn’t this “unrealistic standards” thing just sour grapes? Most women are just average looking. That’s why Scarlett is on the cover of Maxim, not you. No one expects you to get that hot, nor are guys going to dump you to date movie stars (because they cannot). Women are mad for being inferior to celebrities, not because other people have unrealistic expectations that the average woman can be that hot. In other words, it’s an internal thing that makes you unhappy, not other people.
exactly. i’m not what most girls like but i’m not crying about it. a fattish girl who is fun with a good attitude and has her $hit together is much more attractive than a skinny succubus.
also, by skinny with curves, i don’t necessarily mean 110 lbs with DDs and 38 hips (though that’s pretty good). 100-130 lbs with Bs or higher and a distinctly wider hip measurement than waist and you’ve hit the jackpot. most dudes end up settling for skinny with no curves or above average and curvy if they wish to acheive at least some part of this ideal American hottie. i only really say “skinny with curves” to make it distinct from Asia’s ideal of “skinny skinny skinny!”.
and of course skinny is preferred everywhere. today’s average woman, especially in North America, is deemed medically unhealthy.
It’s not hard to be skinny and curvy. Well maybe boobs you can’t do much about, but go to the gym and workout. Do some squats and lunges and $h*t and don’t eat like an anorexic person.
i don’t really get this whole celebrities hype or prestige (is that what it is?) of being on Maksim coverage. I am just curious because I think it actually does a disservice to men by making them think they had to settle for just “an average” woman because they couldn’t get a “truly hot” one. Why do you guys fall for that?
I do not understand your comment. Men are very simple creatures and many are very open that they would “trade up” to a hotter partner if possible. Why do you think rich old men divorce and marry young hot trophy women?
It is the women who continuously convince themselves that they are not “settling”. That is “my husband is not rich/tall/handsome, but he is kind/a good father/loves me”, or so on so forth.
They say that in New York, everyone’s looking for a job, a romantic partner, and an apartment. And if they already have one, they’re looking for something better.
Cynical, but funny because there’s a drop of truth in it, at least on average.
–
My sense is that most people end up with people who are approximately as attractive as they are (in the “whole package” sense, but looks are typically a big part of that for both sexes), and if they aren’t, then the relationship can get unstable if one partner starts to think they can do better and that they’re missing out by not trying.
So the beauty standards get set by magazines and make-up companies that want to sell product, and men look at these women and wonder whether there’s a qualitative jump in life satisfaction by being with someone like that. Most men are not able to attract these women, but it doesn’t stop them from wondering or dreaming or seeing if they can find something to scratch that itch on the internet. That’s how it becomes a beauty standard.
I imagine women have some similar process, albeit with different defining features, but I don’t claim to have a good grasp on how women experience that, other than that it can be quite different than men’s experience. I do think we all dream about what could happen to make our lives as exciting as we hope they might be.
But I think a lot of men and women understand that these things are mostly fantasy and photoshop-enhanced realities anyway. The men hope their partners will be closer to the marketed beauty standard than not, but they understand that the bulk of real women don’t look like that, and if they aren’t stunningly handome or itera-class rich, they are not likely to throw a well-functioning relationship into the ditch just because the photoshopped cover girl on Maxim pushed an extra hot button this month.
There are times when I think my woman is drop dead hot, and times when I think age is starting to catch up to her, but I still love her on both days. And my feelings for her are as much connected to how the rest of our relationship is going as it is to whether she got enough sleep last night.
When you first started actively posting about two years ago (has it been that long?) many suspected you were not, in fact, a woman. I decided to give you the benefit of the doubt but suggested you dig the fairer sex as well (I have terrific gaydar - or whatever the bi version of that is)…it was just a hunch. You emphatically denied any interest in the female of the species.
What I’ve noticed is a lot of attractive women end up with no-so-attractive men, men typically go for looks and white men typically end up with ugly asian women by asian standards.
It has been that long! I am still not certain it was a good idea to start coming here. But I can’t give it up, and I tried.
Hmm. I don’t recall you calling me gay at all! But my answer seem about right. I have no interest in women sexually. I never even had that (pretty basic) fantasy. I did though have several crushes on gay guy friends before I learned they were gay. Very disappointing experience I must say.