Unemployed forever

Water Cooler Careers
#21

Being unemployed was a great experience for me because I got through some real emotional lows and evolved as a person. Ultimately I ended up being a happier person overall because I was forced to figure out what defined me as a person other than some stupid finance job and big paycheck. I developed a real core confidence, got over a lot of shame that was weighing me down, and became a much stronger person.

A lof of what black swan mentioned resonated with me. I developed some relationships that I wouldn’t have otherwise and my values changed significantly.

A few months later, I came across an investment management opportunity that honestly I wouldn’t have even swung at due to self doubt in the past. I interviewed incredibly well, acknowledging my weaknesses, not bullshitting the interviewer, and really trying to connect with the person and have them understand my story and where my strengths were. I got the job and now make 3x the money I did at my last job only a few years ago.

Keep fighting, and don’t be afraid to take a long critical look at yourself and your values.

#22

Stratman, did you used to post under pinkman?

Also, I agree with basically everything you’ve said.

#23

Nope, why?

#24

some great information here guys! I’m kinda stuck in the same boat and I’ve read everyone’s post at least twice…esp the recruiter part. Thanks and I look forward to rereading this when I’m in a better position later!

#25

Agreed. You never know whats coming next. Never. Life can change in a heartbeat

#26

Didn’t see this thread.

OP, don’t give up.

Things have a tendency to work out.

#27

…And to mean revert.

#28

First off, has anyone heard from her since she posted this? Any PMs being sent back and forth? If not, Chad (if you haven’t done so already) please use whatever personal information you have about her to try to find her some help. This is serious stuff.

@hot_pink - How do you feel about sales? Either in some sort of financial advisory role or as a wholesaler/institutional sales? We (us in financial sales) are always looking for women to hire. Women salespeople in financial services make a killing too. They’re in short suppy and demand is high…plus sales is always hiring.

If you want some advice on where to look or what the job entails, let me know. Depending on your licensing and how hard you’re willing to work, I’m fairly certain I could direct you into a job in a matter of days.

#29

I think Numi is supposed to meet up

#30

Numi and I have been in contact with her via PMs.

#31

I’ve contacted her to share with her some of my personal stories of encouragment! =)

#32

What’s so “serious stuff” about this? There’s tons of people in this situation.

In any case, with such a demand for software engineers, I don’t see why OP just changes fields, there’s no point sticking to finance.

#33

She’s in good hands. Thank you both.

#34

The part about ending herself.

S200 and Numi, you guys are my hero.

#35

S2000 is definitely a hero to many. Completely off-topic but everytime I see one of his posts I see a Honda S2000 in my mind haha. Not that it’s a bad thing, I mean, v-tec is great isn’t it =)

#36

Then why do you discount me by 90%?

#37

My pleasure.

#38

Jesus dude. Even with my near-complete lack of empathy I still recognize this chick needs help. Reaching out and offering assistance is just the right thing to do.

#39

At the same time, there is only so much we can do on an anonymous forum. Yes, it’s great that we were able to offer encouragement and support, and I was grateful that none of our members came up with negative commentary that could have pushed her the opposite direction. This was one of AF’s finer hours.

It was great that Numi met up with her, but Numi can’t meet up and help everyone who is frustrated with their job search, particularly since he normally does that as a business. We can’t have people thinking “ah, all I have to do is mention despair, and Numi will come and take on my case for free.”

I agree that we need to encourage the OP to contact suicide prevention hotlines if she gets to that blue place again, but do we go ahead report her to one without her permission? What else should we start reporting about our members to various authorities?

I think that PMs offering support, posts offering useful links, stories about how her situation isn’t as unique and hopeless as she might have thought are awesome, and that’s the right way to go.

At the same time, here are some useful links and stuff worth thinking about:

Suicide Prevention Hotline : for those who are potentially feeling hopeless and suicidal, but would rather not have to if there is another option ( http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ )

Helping Someone Who is Suicidal : ( http://www.helpguide.org/articles/suicide-prevention/suicide-prevention-helping-someone-who-is-suicidal.htm )

I read somewhere that in the US, the number of known suicides is roughly 2x the number of homicides. There are also many suicides that are not obviously suicides, such as deaths that result from excessively risky behavior (e.g. car crashes and such, extreme sports ) that was driven by suicidal desires. That doesn’t mean all extreme sports peopel are suicidal, but suicidal people may enter extreme sports thinking (I’ve always wanted to try this, and if I die, it doesn’t matter to me much anyway).

#40

Just being practical, but it’s very hard to get her permission when she’s dead.