I was asked several months back to be the best man in a wedding and the date is fast approaching. They would like me to give two speeches, one at the rehearsal dinner and the other at the reception. This weekend I plan to start thinking about what I’m going to say, how long it should be, etc. I plan to scour the internet for advice, but I wanted to query AF first. Any tips would be appreciated.
Short and sweet (5-10 mins max). Stay away from any cringe-inducing stories. Geniune heartfelt anecdotes will go down best. Throw in a few jokes and you’re set.
The best man at a wedding I went to started off by saying “When Ben told me that he was going to ask Katie to marry him I said ‘That’s a terrible decision, DON’T DO IT!’” I wouldn’t recommend saying that. It the room went silent, very uncomfortable. He went way too far by implying that she wasn’t who he should be marrying. My best man made a toast that started off by going through how close we are. It was rife with thinly veiled references to homoeroticism, but it had everyone doubled over laughing because it was light hearted and was clearly not serious about us “sharing several special and intimate moments.” Then he went into how much he likes my wife and how good we are together and brought it home in a classy way. It was perfect. You need to throw in a little good natured humor but end with something of substance. I would shoot for about 3 mins max and about a 20/80 split between humor and sincerity.
Talk about your opinion on the benefits of CFA vs. MBA.
“Before my toast, I would like to ask both Mr. and Mrs. to raise their right hands. Now, Mrs, please place your hand on the table. Mr. place your hand on top of her’s. Mr., enjoy this moment, because this is the last time you will ever have the upper hand.”
nice gunner
keep it fairly short, <5 mins. First thank the bride’s parents for throwing such a lovely party, or groom’s (for the rehearsal dinner). definitely don’t go for too much humor and no inside jokes. the key to remember is you are speaking really only to the bride and groom and not everyone else in attendance.
I’d just like to start by laying down a couple of rules. Firstly, no heckling please. And secondly, if you do have a mobile phone…please, leave it switched on; keep yourselves entertained. I think if you keep your spirits high and your expectations low, everyone will be happy.
"Well, let me be the first to say congratulations to you man; you have one v—a for the rest of your life. Real smart man. "
Hello Mister Walrus Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Talk about your opinion on the benefits of CFA vs. > MBA. +1
“When Smitty first called me and asked me if I knew a good lawyer for contracs, I thought he was going into business…”
Some good advice above - thank the hosts, be welcoming to the bride, make the groom look good, leave the audience wanting more. Take it seriously (it is an honor to be asked to stand up for someone), speak clearly, and wait until you are done to get drunk. And let the maid of honor go first.
Bankin’, I suggest you out your cousin in front of all the relatives! Let me know how it goes.
Keep it short. Nobody cares about it but the bride and her mom.
sublimity Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Bankin’, I suggest you out your cousin in front of > all the relatives! > > Let me know how it goes. you mean make out with his cousin.
don’t read a poem, irish blessing, or anything canned like that. my brother had 3 best men (i was one). the other two both read some canned blessing/speech and it was just boring. my speech went well since the bride and i haven’t gotten along in the past and i welcomed her to the family. i wouldn’t recommend picking a fight with the bride for the sole purpose of having the same effect though.
pupdawg82 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > sublimity Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Bankin’, I suggest you out your cousin in front > of > > all the relatives! > > > > Let me know how it goes. > > > you mean make out with his cousin. B@ng her badly
pupdawg82 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > sublimity Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Bankin’, I suggest you out your cousin in front > of > > all the relatives! > > > > Let me know how it goes. > > > you mean make out with his cousin. his cousin is legitimately gay (like JOE2010), that was my reference
Carson Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Short and sweet (5-10 mins max). Stay away from > any cringe-inducing stories. Geniune heartfelt > anecdotes will go down best. Throw in a few jokes > and you’re set. I’ll definitely stay away from the ‘cringe-inducing stories’ perhaps prior to delivering the speech I should imply otherwise to keep the groom on his toes. notenoughtheta Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > The best man at a wedding I went to started off by > saying “When Ben told me that he was going to ask > Katie to marry him I said ‘That’s a terrible > decision, DON’T DO IT!’” > > I wouldn’t recommend saying that. It the room went > silent, very uncomfortable. He went way too far by > implying that she wasn’t who he should be > marrying. > > My best man made a toast that started off by going > through how close we are. It was rife with thinly > veiled references to homoeroticism, but it had > everyone doubled over laughing because it was > light hearted and was clearly not serious about us > “sharing several special and intimate moments.” > Then he went into how much he likes my wife and > how good we are together and brought it home in a > classy way. It was perfect. You need to throw in a > little good natured humor but end with something > of substance. > > I would shoot for about 3 mins max and about a > 20/80 split between humor and sincerity. I will shoot to work in some humor, but end with something of substance. Thanks! Hello Mister Walrus Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Talk about your opinion on the benefits of CFA vs. > MBA. DUH! That’s how I plan to open and close, I’m looking for advice on the middle of the speech. mep_cfa’10 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > keep it fairly short, <5 mins. First thank the > bride’s parents for throwing such a lovely party, > or groom’s (for the rehearsal dinner). definitely > don’t go for too much humor and no inside jokes. > the key to remember is you are speaking really > only to the bride and groom and not everyone else > in attendance. I will certainly start by thanking the thrower of each party, that seems like the best intro and a seamless way to get the speech going. I will also look into speaking ‘to’ the bride and groom as opposed to ‘to’ the audience, that hadn’t occurred to me. Thanks! thommo77 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I’d just like to start by laying down a couple of > rules. Firstly, no heckling please. And secondly, > if you do have a mobile phone…please, leave it > switched on; keep yourselves entertained. I think > if you keep your spirits high and your > expectations low, everyone will be happy. Keep my mobile phone on? Hmmm… I’d hate for my P-Diddy ring to start blaring while everyone is silent and looking at me. I may have to pass on that one. anc417 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Some good advice above - thank the hosts, be > welcoming to the bride, make the groom look good, > leave the audience wanting more. > > Take it seriously (it is an honor to be asked to > stand up for someone), speak clearly, and wait > until you are done to get drunk. And let the maid > of honor go first. I didn’t know I was supposed to let the maid of honor go first, that’s pretty revealing as to how much I’ve paid attention at weddings past. Do I immediately follow or is there a lag? If there is a lag, what kind of lag is appropriate? What if the maid of honor isn’t going? Should I introduce myself and say ‘listen b!tch, I’m waiting on you.’? sublimity Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Bankin’, I suggest you out your cousin in front of > all the relatives! > > Let me know how it goes. That cousin is on my dad’s side of the family and the groom is, ironically, my cousin on my mom’s side of the family. So, the former will not be in attendance. The latter is very straight and nabbed a wife whom I would consider to be out of his league. Thanks everyone for the suggestions and please keep them coming.
I only suggested to let the maid of honor go first (if she is giving a toast) because, based on my completely unscientific research of attending lots of weddings, their toasts tend to be awful. The rest of the guests will welcome your quick wit and sincere thoughts after a 10 minute cry fest about dance camp. Also, since it looks like this is a family affair and you are giving 2 speeches you could probably tell a funny story about crazy uncle louie at the rehearsal dinner but keep it classy at the reception.