I actually wish my wife had not changed her name because it has caused a ton of headaches. As previously noted, her legal maiden name was actually two last names, but practically speaking she only used her father’s last name. As a result, she had some documents with both last names and some with just her father’s last name. To make things worse, she has always gone by her middle name instead of her first name, so some documents had her middle name and her father’s last name, but not her first name and her mother’s last name.
Wait a sec, just to clarify, is this the school of thought popular in the West that goes something like “women can do whatever they want without consulting the man such as have an abortion, plastic surgury, a name change, or a divorce, and the guy has no say”? Cause actually I say it does have something to do with me.
Feel sorry for that guy and his long lost nuts.
Well since you’re not married to or in a relationship with these women what this really is is a case of ‘giving a f*ck when its not your turn to give a f*ck.’
Hmm. There’s nothing wrong about having an opinion about disassociated people. Most people in the US don’t know any women in Burkina Faso, but they would have an opinion about say… forced female circumcision. Should we go around saying that it’s none of their business?
I would, who are we to judge other cultural practices from our ethnocentric points of view? Besides we have enough of our own problems to contend with before we judge others.
I really don’t worry about things that either a) don’t effect me b) I have no control over. Both forced female circumscision in the third world and the decline of patriachry in the western world fall into those categories. I am secure in myself and I really don’t give a flying f if a woman decides she doesn’t want to take someone else’s last name.
A lot of incidents of Genocide also have no direct relationship to you.
So you’re cool with that too, then?
Nice equivalency, some geek mourning the precieved loss of male privledge isn’t quite the same as mass murder.
If you want an honest answer, I can tell you that other then thinking its a sad tradegy I wouldn’t give it too much thought. The world is a brutal, unforgiving place full of suffering. I accept that fact and pick my battles as to the things I invest energy into and the things that I don’t. Worrying/having an opinion about most things just leads to needless suffering.
That does not mean that it is wrong to have an opinion.
I never said it was wrong to have an opinion, its just a waste of time and energy.
How about having an opinion about other people having opinions?
ahhhhhhhhh shit…
Just to provide another data point for Latin America, in Brazil the more common is for the wife to add the husband’s last name (it becomes their last name as well). Less common is for both to keep their original names. I don’t think I’ve ever saw a husband taking the wife’s name here, and I’m pretty sure I never saw anybody with an hyphenated name in Brazil.
As for kids, it’s probably more common to add just the father’s name. Adding both (mother first, father as last name) is pretty common too.
No idea why those are the most common conventions.
One thing that is very different from US is that people here usually call each other by their first names, not only among friends, but in school or even a lot of business situations. Asides from hotels, I don’t think I’ve ever been called “Mr (last name)” here. “Mr (first name)”, which I guess is unheard of in US, is common.