I have a don’t ask don’t tell rule.
Saw a girl for 6 months last year. After the first time we hooked up, I got the ol’ “So this is cool and everything but if you ever have sex with someone else without a condom, please tell me”. Needless to say, she beat me to it and confessed the next day. I then proceeded to lay an old flame of mine and made it to where she would find out.
That was the end of that LOL point is, it VERY rarely ends well or works out.
Alphie you reading this homie?
Western youth have completely lost the plot. They have destroyed the two unit family structure in exchange for hooking up, open relationships and polygamy. They are incapable of being honest without liberal consumption of alcohol and look for meaningul relationships in shitty bars that play remixes of ed bloody sheeran.
The women are mental. They complain that there are no dateable guys but if some dude asks them out then he is too keen. The men are doubly mental and complete basketcases.
What a complete shitshow, time for them to pack it in and call it a day
yea cause you know who has wonderful family units? Asians lol. Several asian families I know are all miserable just like the rest of us. Gfs parents both agreed marriage should be a 25 year contract lol, they made a compelling argument for it as well
Asian families are among the most dysfunctional I have seen. The only redeeming feature is they will hold it together for practical matters like for the kids, or to avoid the destruction of wealth (to a higher degree of tolerance than other social groups).
Chinese Whispers = PA
I may be “Western” but I was born in HK. So I guess you could say I got the best of both worlds? Asian families are far from being honest. Why? Because they lack open communication. It’s all about saving face and listening to your elders no matter what. Bottling up feelings leads to anger and anger leads to resentment. Eventually that erupts. Growing up in Canada, I fully despise that train of thought.
I guess I have to give a bit of background as to why I started this thread. Not sure how much detail to give but here goes.
I’ve always liked dance and after BChad (rip) made a post last year to take lessons, I finally signed up at the beginning of this year. I met a woman in her 40’s there. She started playfully flirty with me and it was all good fun. I didn’t really think much of it until she said she really liked me. She invited me over to her house for dinner which I accepted. I met her husband (common law, Ontario) and daughter.
She said felt a lot of emotion because she used to go out dancing a lot when she was younger. I asked her if she really liked me or if it was because I reminded her of her youth and she confirmed it was because she really liked me. Whatever. Of course, I didn’t really reciprocate because she had a family so I still accepted it as good fun. But two days ago, she asked me about an open relationship and what I thought of it. She said she talked to her husband about it two years ago and brought it up again recently.
I’m seeing her again tonight so I’ll see what she says again.
I skimmed this thread and so far, only Nery, Yayyywork and Ramos are for it. The rest of you say no. I don’t see this as a long term thing. I just see this as dating multiple people. I’m still not sure though but if you never try, you’re never going to score that 90 +3’ game-winning header, right???
why did Zidhai change his name to Chinaman Whispering?
i’d give you the green light in this situation. What im against is a woman cheating with a single man and the single man being “open” to the taken women.
“What im against is a woman cheating with a single man and the single man being “open” to the taken women.”
Isn’t that what hei.so described?
Agreed I think the key to any relationship is communication. If you are only looking for some fun, and so is she? Great. If she has a partner and she is open & honest with him and he doesnt care, cool whats the issue. There do seem to be plenty of guys out there that arent jealous and dont care about stuff like this. Maybe they have aged and arent very sexual anymore, maybe they are getting some on the side who knows. I know that isnt how I would be in my relationship but I dont pretend to know anyone elses situation/wants/desires.
If all cards are on the table and everyone is ok with it, have some fun.
Not exactly bc she spoke with her husband about it and it appears it’s ok - i mean he even had dinner with the guy. I never understood this tolerance but to each their own
No, he discussed the wife talking to her partner about the possibility of an open relationship. If everyone is on the same page its not cheating, its a decision those involved made. Now if she were to lie and go behind her husbands back, she would be a POS. If hei.so were to know she was lying to her husband and go with it, he would also be a POS.
Got it. Makes sense to me now.
Just saw this on the front page of the NYT lol
https://mobile.nytimes.com/2017/05/11/magazine/is-an-open-marriage-a-happier-marriage.html
Single man open to taken women is fine…the taken woman is the POS here. The single man…is a single man. It’s the woman’s responsibility here to be faithful to her guy…if she’s willing to cheat then her dude should dump her ass. Now if the single man is friend’s with the woman’s guy…then he has a responsibility to his friendship to not sleep with the chick. But if he doesn’t know him…then he has absolutely zero responsibility to some random ass stranger who is probably not treating his woman right since she is seeking love elsewhere anyway.
^ disagree, youre still a scum bag if you are banging some woman cheating. Sure you have zero technical responsibility, but I just would hope it would happen to you.
Let us know how it goes
Did it happen to you? Is that why you’re bitter? Sorry dude. If it ever happened to me, I would 100% blame the girl for being a slut and to another extent myself for not keeping her happy enough to not want to cheat.
The morality part is for you to decide, but like I said earlier, being the other guy, you are usually the one that gets screwed. He may say he’s cool with it but trust me, eventually he won’t. Jealousy, bitterness etc, are human nature. It strikes me as very odd that you met their teenage daughter as well. I’m guessing you’re not the first person she’s proposed this to, so there is the disease concern as well. As short term as you feel this relationship is going to be, it will get back to you in some way with higher likelihood than not, and maybe in some ways you couldn’t fathom. The fact that you’ve raised it to an online forum should be redflag in itself.
My suggestion is to recluse yourself. No good will come from this… and you have not once said she is hot so there is no redeeming excuse here.
That is unless she is the MD of a top 2 non-hacksaw investment bank and you’re angling for a six figure banking/ER/trading job for services rendered. In which case I approve and you go lil cubby. #CvMLivesOn
That’s the logical conclusion. Guess it depends on how much you care about the woman. If you really love her, you probably wouldn’t be thinking logically. You’d likely want to kill everyone involved.